Monday, November 3, 2014

Aspirations of a Southern Belle Part 2

Saturday night, I spent a good hour composing what I would have said when this guy I know confronted me on Friday morning.  More than a day had gone by and I was still obsessing about this. I don’t know what that tells you about me, but there it is.

When the actual event occurred I was pissed.  And tongue-tied.  I could not come up with even one brilliantly scathing thing to say!

It took me about 30 minutes to calm down.  (You can read yesterday’s post for the whole story.) When I was able to stop seeing red, I realized that the jerks in the world did not deserve that much attention and energy from me.  I thought I was over it.  I thought I had put it away.  But then, a few moments of quiet on Saturday night gave way to the fantasy of what I would have said if my wits were about me.

Want to hear?

If I could rewind that moment I would have said, “I’m sorry.  But impatient is not a negative quality.   I simply stated a fact.  You are impatient, just as I am almost always late.   It is just a trait.  It may be one that you want to improve upon, but it is what it is.  Negative would be if I told your son that you were a rude, insensitive, ill-manned boor.  But I didn’t, did I?  I stated a fact.  A fact that I have gathered after you picked up your child numerous times from my house and I listened to you honk the horn while you waited in the comfort of your vehicle for him to appear.  I would never disparage you in front of your son.  I would never tell him that you are a bully who is mean and unfair and a cheater.  So the next time that you want to confront me in a public place in that supercilious manner you are currently using, make damn sure that you have a good reason.”

Just putting that on paper made me feel better. 

Maybe the next time, I’ll finally don my Southern Belle persona and smile saccharinely before I speak.

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