Saturday night, I spent a good hour composing what I would
have said when this guy I know confronted me on Friday morning. More than a day had gone by and I was still
obsessing about this. I don’t know what that tells you about me, but there it
is.
When the actual event occurred I was pissed. And tongue-tied. I could not come up with even one brilliantly
scathing thing to say!
It took me about 30 minutes to calm down. (You can read yesterday’s post for the whole
story.) When I was able to stop seeing red, I realized that the jerks in the
world did not deserve that much attention and energy from me. I thought I was over it. I thought I had put it away. But then, a few moments of quiet on Saturday
night gave way to the fantasy of what I would have said if my wits were about
me.
Want to hear?
If I could rewind that moment I would have said, “I’m
sorry. But impatient is not a negative
quality. I simply stated a fact. You are impatient, just as I am almost always
late. It is just a trait. It may be one that you want to improve upon,
but it is what it is. Negative would be
if I told your son that you were a rude, insensitive, ill-manned boor. But I didn’t, did I? I stated a fact. A fact that I have gathered after you picked
up your child numerous times from my house and I listened to you honk the horn
while you waited in the comfort of your vehicle for him to appear. I would never disparage you in front of your
son. I would never tell him that you are
a bully who is mean and unfair and a cheater.
So the next time that you want to confront me in a public place in that
supercilious manner you are currently using, make damn sure that you have a
good reason.”
Just putting that on paper made me feel better.
Maybe the next time, I’ll finally don my Southern Belle
persona and smile saccharinely before I speak.
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